May is the month we honor our mothers.  Mothers are the source of worldly wisdom, dating advice, recipes, and ...underwear.

From the moment you were born, underwear was on your mother's mind. Worrying about undergarments was part of the nine-month training program our mothers endured before we arrived. Depending upon how old you are now, your mother either spent a great deal of time hemming flour sacks, or she invested a goodly portion of her retirement fund for `Huggies' by the ton. But, regardless of the decade, mothers and underwear are synonymous!

By the time we were out of diapers, our mothers had developed new concerns regarding our inner attire. It suddenly became terribly important to have TRAINING PANTS. Little boys got miniature versions of Dad's boxers or jockies, and daughters wore little white cotton numbers, scattered with tiny rosebuds or daisies. (I always suspected there were advantages to being a girl!)

Adolescence brought new fears to our mothers. Never mind worrying about the kid driving, dating or flunking math. Mothers worry about underwear! Somewhere on the `Winds of Time' floats the universal words of ALL mothers: "Don't forget to change your underwear. You wouldn't want to be in an accident... What if you had to go to the hospital?" My mother was also particularly fond of "You're not wearing THOSE are you?" (I used to believe my mother really did have x-ray eyes. How could she tell that I was wearing the black Saturday bikinis on Tuesday?)

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